Azarius experiences: my first ayahuasca ceremony

In the series ‘Azarius experiences', one of the indomitable Azarius employees shares his or her experience with a psychoactive substance or product related to psychonaut or stoner culture. In today's episode, ayahuasca:

“According to many sources using psychedelics in combination with a ritual would give a total different experience compared to using them hedonistically. This made me curious and I signed up for an ayahuasca ceremony.

A couple of weeks later I took the train. During my journey I started to worry a bit: ayahuasca is known as a very potent psychedelic, maybe even more potent than LSD. Simultaneously it can make you extremely nauseous. An ayahuasca trip without vomiting or diarrhea is supposed to be impossible. The combination of a heavy trip and a body shouting for personal care seemed a huge challenge to me.

The tipi

At the place of arrival I found an immense tipi, smoke coming out of the top. Obviously this fitted quite nice in my picture of shamanism. Likewise, the environment captured my imagination: I found myself on a huge estate with a serious forest. All participants acquainted each other, then the ceremony started. We all sat down in a circle on our mattresses in the tipi.

The shaman invited everyone to come forward to take the drink. When it was my turn, I stood up nervously, walked to the front and received a small cup that contained a brownish liquid. I swallowed it at once, looked the shaman into his eyes and tried to smile friendly at him. Which failed: my face contorted because of the terribly bitter taste. This was absolutely the most awful thing I ever tasted. Quickly I drank some water and walked back to my mattress.

The trip

Full of expectations I waited for what was about to come. I heard some barely notice a thing the first time. It seems ayahuasca’s effects grow stronger the more often you use it. For me this clearly wasn’t the case. Within an hour everything merged into a motley palette of colours. The whole world lit up. It was as if I had landed in a rainbow. The normal world I could barely see. Without doubt this ayahuasca was very powerful. Unfortunately I could not really enjoy it, because I became nauseous. I tried to stand up, which was difficult: my legs were very weak.

Tottering - I could barely see - I walked outside. Before the trip started I already spotted special pits, designed to catch the vomit. For convenience sake they were marked by flags. But now it was dark. Moreover, I tripped extremely hard and therefore couldn’t see anything. I walked around aimlessly, until suddenly a flag loomed in my field of vision. Carefully I walked towards the flag and was about to vomit, when suddenly a co-tripper caught up with me from behind, reached the pit half a meter before me and threw up, completely filling the pit. He clearly was not going away quickly.

The toilet

Suddenly I got an idea. Beforehand I was told there would be a toilet right behind the tipi. As quick as my trip allowed, I ran to the spot. However, I could not find the toilet, there was no sign of a cubicle anywhere. Until I discovered, with dismay, a cesspool, that without any shielding stood in the middle of an open field. So ....... Yet I did not think any longer and first emptied myself from above and then from below.

Strangely enough this wasn’t unpleasant. It felt like all kinds of emotional pain were released. A wave of relief swept through me. Finally I could relax and enjoy my trip. Astonished I looked out over a beautiful field, the trees gave bright green light, the world vibrated. Breathlessly, I looked around. The life energy was visible everywhere, as luminescent wires. For a moment I forgot where I was. However, I was still sitting on top of the cesspool.

And then...

Suddenly someone stood beside me. As I said, there was no cubicle build around the toilet. The person standing beside me probably tripped even harder than me. He clearly didn’t see me, took off his pants and almost sat upon me. I could just prevent this by loudly shouting "Hello!" The man was frightened to death and hobbled away, picking up his pants. Luckily we were both tripping so hard that we did not recognize each other (I hoped). Carefully I stood up, walked back to the tipi and continued my trip there. Unfortunately, I didn’t notice much of the ceremony. After a few hours I fell asleep.

In retrospect, I must admit that ayahuasca is undoubtedly a very powerful psychedelic with strong visual effects. But this first experience was absolutely no more intense than some of my hedonistic excesses. Every trip is different, however, and a few months later I decided to give ayahuasca another try."

Stay tuned... to be continued!



Written by: Sofie